The Paralyzed Soul
THERE are times when trials are so intense, temptations so fierce, emotions so embroiled, that recollection is very difficult. I want to pray, but my mind is spinning; I want to rest, but my body is reeling; I want to believe, but my soul is wrestling with a thousand doubts. Sometimes, these are moments of spiritual warfare—an attack by the enemy to discourage and drive the soul into sin and despair… but permitted nonetheless by God to allow the soul to see its weakness and constant need for Him, and thus draw nearer to the Source of its strength.
Fr. George Kosicki, one of the "grandfathers" of making known the message of Divine Mercy that was revealed to St. Faustina, sent me a draft of a powerful book that will hopefully be available to the public soon. In Faustina’s Weapon, Fr. George identifies the experiences of spiritual attack that St. Faustina went through:
Groundless attacks, aversion toward certain sisters, depression, temptations, strange images, couldn’t recollect herself at prayer, confusion, couldn’t think, strange pain, and she wept. —Fr. George Kosicki, Faustina’s Weapon
He even identifies some of his own ‘attacks’ as including ‘a "concert" of headaches… fatigue, drifting mind, a "zombie" head, attacks of sleepiness during prayer, irregular sleep pattern, in addition to doubts, oppression, anxiety, and worry.’
At times like these, we may not identify with the saints. We cannot picture ourselves as the close companions of Jesus like John or Peter; we feel even more unworthy than the adulterous or hemorrhaging woman who touched him; we do not even feel capable of speaking to him like the lepers or the blind man of Bethsaida. There are times when we feel simply paralyzed.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Please no anonymous comments. I require at least some way for people to address each other personally and courteously. Having some name or handle helps.
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.