July 25, 1994
After Communion
R. My dear dear Lord,
I long to be with You, so close. I miss the tender moments. I do not get to be with You and this morning am overwhelmed with sadness, instead of joy to be with You! I want to spend my hours with You and when I do not, I miss that time so! I squandered my time. I talk on the phone or go out some nights and miss my morning prayers with You. I want to be with You for hours in front of the tabernacle. I miss You and love You so much, to tears!
I long so for You. I want greater union with You. I thirst after knowledge of You. I long to be with You. You are my all, Lord. I long so to be with You in front of the tabernacle.
I am sad for all the hours I missed today and yesterday. I miss my intimacy with You. I miss You. Nothing else can be likened to being with You. I love You so! Now I know the sorrow of my heart, the joy to behold You now, bitter sweetness, sorrow and joy, love and pain, You are my all!
During Mass I wanted to cry. I could hear Jesus say, "this is My Body, My flesh, this is My Blood." I saw the little lamb led to the slaughter. I look at the crucifix and I realize His immense love. It saddens me so to know many who do not know this love and how He loves them so. It is painful to know this and watch people miss His beautiful love.
The readings were exciting. I love to hear His words. It just excites me to hear the readings, the psalm and the gospel. I wanted to cry today because I love Him so and He is truly here. This is no myth. The readings at Mass are alive in my life today.
The Mass is so beautiful. I love it more every day. What a gift to go to Mass. Oh, Father, how little I am, but I give myself in my entirety to You. The more I know You, the more I want to get lost in Jesus, to be hid away in His tender Heart. I love You so, my precious Savior!
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